When We Fail Traumatized Kids

Hey Parents & Caregivers, 

I was out for a walk recently with a close friend who was sharing about some of the challenges their family has faced in accessing services for their adopted daughter. In the midst of sharing her own challenges, she shared that this feels small relative to the challenges of others she knows in the adoptive parent community. She then shared about a family she knows whose kindergarten-aged child was recently told she could not return to school due to behavioural concerns. When asked about trauma-informed training the school admitted to having none beyond basic non-violent crisis intervention training. No understanding of triggering, so skills to support a child coming from a host of traumatic experiences, no sensitivities to the needs of the traumatized child, and making decisions that will now further traumatize and destabilize this child’s life. A trauma-advocating parent’s nightmare.  

For many parents and caregivers supporting trauma surviving kids, there is hope that other grown ups in our kids lives will be trauma-informed and trained to support, yet so often that is not the case. Whether it is untrained school staff, or barriers to accessing trauma therapy support due to long waitlists or cost limitations, or reduced access due to rural living, or a myriad of other challenges in getting sufficient support – what we CAN control is US. 

You, as your child’s parent or caregiver, are THE single most significant influence in your child’s life and story of healing. When equipped with the right skills, you have the greatest capacity to shift the course of trauma in your child’s life, and power in shifting the way trauma shows up and influences your entire family system. This is exactly why I created the Trauma Attuned Parent Program, so that YOU can feel empowered to create change regardless of the other conditions putting limits on you, your child and your family’s healing.  

Journeying alongside you,

~ Heather

PS. This training program has been used by group home staff and related care-providing teams, if you are interested in group access to this program please contact support@thrive-life.ca to learn more.